Welcome to the oh-so-boring city of Cambridge, where there is absolutely nothing exciting or interesting to do. I mean, who needs centuries-old buildings steeped in history and picturesque river views? Definitely not you! But hey, since you’re here already, why not stick around and discover the best things this dreadfully dull place has to offer? Don’t worry, we’ll make it as painless as possible. So grab your sense of adventure (if you can find it), and let’s dive into the riveting world of “things to do in Cambridge”! Get ready for a snooze-fest like no other!
Best Things to Do in Cambridge
1. Punt Down the River
Ah, punting down the river! What a thrilling experience that is. I mean, who wouldn’t want to sit in a boat while someone else does all the hard work of pushing it along with a long stick? It’s like being on a leisurely stroll but without actually having to use your legs. How exciting!
As you lazily drift down the River Cam, you’ll have plenty of time to admire the stunning views of the well, more old buildings and charming bridges. But hey, at least you can take some incredibly riveting photos for your social media feed. And don’t forget about those delightful moments when your punt gets stuck in shallow waters or crashes into another boat because steering requires actual skill and attention.
Oh, and let’s not forget about the joyous shouts from other tourists as they navigate their own boats nearby. The cacophony of noise adds an extra layer of excitement to this already adrenaline-pumping activity.
2. See Modern Art Masterpieces at Kettle’s Yard
Are you a fan of modern art? Do you enjoy staring at abstract paintings and trying to decipher their hidden meanings? Well, then, Kettle’s Yard is the place for you! Prepare to be amazed by the masterpieces on display in this contemporary art gallery.
As soon as you step inside Kettle’s Yard, you’ll be greeted with avant-garde sculptures that will make your head spin. You won’t be able to resist taking out your phone and snapping pictures of these mind-boggling creations. And don’t worry if you have no idea what they mean – just pretend like you do and nod along with everyone else!
But it doesn’t stop there. Oh no! Kettle’s Yard also offers a variety of interactive exhibits where you can touch, feel, and even smell the artwork. Who needs traditional paintings when you can experience art in such unconventional ways?
3. Pop Inside King’s College Chapel
Ah, King’s College Chapel is the quintessential tourist attraction in Cambridge. What better way to spend your time in this historic city than popping inside a centuries-old chapel and marvelling at its grandeur?!
As you step through those hallowed doors, prepare to be amazed by the stunning Gothic architecture that took over 100 years to complete. The soaring ceilings, intricate stained glass windows, and ornate carvings will surely leave you in awe – or maybe just slightly underwhelmed if you’ve seen one too many churches.
But wait! There’s more! Don’t forget to crane your neck upwards towards the famous fan vaulting ceiling. Yes, because nothing says a fun day out with family or friends like straining your neck trying to appreciate an architectural feat that isn’t even practical.
4. See the Mathematical Bridge
If you’re dying to see a bridge that defies the laws of physics and challenges your entire understanding of mathematics, then look no further than the Mathematical Bridge in Cambridge. Prepare to have your mind blown by this architectural marvel!
Legend has it that this bridge was designed by Sir Isaac Newton himself during one of his legendary brainwaves. As you stand before it, you can’t help but admire its intricate design and wonder how on earth, it manages to stay upright without any screws or bolts holding it together.
But don’t be fooled by its name – the Mathematical Bridge is not just for math geeks and number nerds. It’s a sight worth seeing for anyone who appreciates craftsmanship and ingenuity. Plus, it makes for some pretty impressive Instagram photos!
5. Brunch at Fitzbilies
Ah, brunch. The epitome of sophistication and leisure. And where better to indulge in this delightful mid-morning activity than at Fitzbillies in Cambridge? Prepare yourself for an experience that will leave your taste buds tingling with joy (and perhaps a touch of gluttony).
Step into the charming café adorned with vintage decor and bask in the warm ambience. As you peruse the menu, be prepared to have your toughest decision-making skills put to the test – should you go for their famous sticky Chelsea bun or opt for a savoury delight like eggs benedict?
Once your order arrives, brace yourself for a feast fit for royalty. Sink your teeth into fluffy pancakes drizzled with maple syrup, or savour every bite of their decadent French toast topped with fresh berries.
6. The Cambridge Gin Laboratory
If you’re looking for a way to turn your trip to Cambridge into an educational experience on the finer things in life (ahem, gin), then look no further than The Cambridge Gin Laboratory. Yes, because when I think of visiting one of the most prestigious universities in the world, my first thought is obviously to learn about the science behind distilling alcohol.
Step inside this laboratory and prepare yourself for a crash course in all things juniper berry. You’ll get to sample different types of gin and even create your own unique blend. Because who needs a degree from Cambridge when you can boast about being a certified gin connoisseur instead?
But wait, there’s more! Not only will you be surrounded by test tubes and botanicals, but you’ll also have the opportunity to try out some delicious cocktails crafted by expert mixologists.
7. Take the “Hop on Hop Off” Bus
If you’re looking for an exciting way to see Cambridge, why not hop on the “Hop on Hop Off” bus? Apparently, walking is too mainstream. Sit back and relax as you join a bunch of other tourists who also couldn’t be bothered to explore the city on foot.
As you embark on this thrilling adventure, prepare yourself for endless loops around the same streets over and over again. Who needs variety when you can enjoy the scenic view of multiple traffic lights and crowded sidewalks?
But wait, it gets even better! With every stop along the route, you have the fantastic opportunity to witness dozens of people rushing past in a hurry to catch their next bus connection. Yes, folks, nothing says fun like watching stressed-out commuters while sitting comfortably in your air-conditioned seat.
8. Climb a Church Tower
Who doesn’t love climbing church towers? It’s the perfect way to spend your day huffing and puffing up countless flights of stairs just to catch a glimpse of, well, more stairs. But hey, at least you can say you’ve conquered a towering architectural masterpiece!
Once you reach the top (if your legs haven’t turned into jelly by then), prepare yourself for the breathtaking view of…more rooftops! Yes, it’s true – Cambridge is known for its stunning skyline of tiles and chimneys. But don’t worry. There might be a stray pigeon or two to liven things up.
As you make your descent back down those seemingly endless steps, take a moment to reflect on all those calories burned and muscles strained. Who needs an intense workout class when you can climb church towers instead? Just be sure to stretch beforehand – those medieval stone steps are not forgiving on the knees!
9. Get a Chelsea Bun at Fitzbillies
If you’re feeling adventurous and have a sweet tooth that just won’t quit, then you absolutely must get yourself a Chelsea Bun at Fitzbillies. Now, I know what you’re thinking – how can something as simple as a bun be worth the hype? Well, let me tell you, this is no ordinary bun.
First off, let’s talk about the size. These buns are massive! They practically defy gravity with their sheer height and girth. And don’t even get me started on the sticky glaze that covers every inch of these bad boys. It’s like eating pure sugar bliss.
But it’s not just about the size and sweetness; it’s also about the texture. The dough is perfectly soft and fluffy on the inside while maintaining a slightly crispy exterior. It’s like biting into a cloud that has been caramelized to perfection.
10. Climb to the top of Great St Mary’s
If you’re looking for something incredibly thrilling and heart-pounding to do in Cambridge, then climbing to the top of Great St Mary’s might just be the activity for you. I mean, who doesn’t love a good leg workout combined with vertigo-inducing heights? Strap on your sneakers and get ready for an adventure!
As you ascend the seemingly endless spiral staircase, don’t forget to marvel at the breathtaking views of Cambridge below. It’s like being on top of the world, or at least on top of a really tall church tower. And hey, if heights aren’t your thing, no worries! You can always stay safely grounded and admire the stunning architecture from below.
Once you reach the summit (or catch your breath halfway up), take a moment to soak it all in. The panoramic vistas are truly Instagram-worthy and will make all your friends green with envy. Just be sure not to drop your phone while attempting that perfect selfie – we wouldn’t want it falling into oblivion!